8 Tips to Prepare for Fourth year of Medical School

As the wife of an anesthesia attending, I know medical school is quite an experience and everyone has their own unique journey. I also know that getting to fourth year can be often be a challenge. We have had our share of the good, bad and ugly life experiences. Medical school for sure was a tough road for us. Leading up to fourth year all of our struggles have come from trying to balance school, work & home life. Here I have a few tips to help you survive fourth year!

Tip 1: Budget, Budget, Budget- At this point you should have your bills and loan money down to a science. Fourth year was one of our most expensive years in my husband’s medical school journey. There are so many extra costs that you need to account for, such as residency application cost, travel (gas, car rental, hotel, food, etc) cost to and from interviews (unless your one of the lucky ones who applies to a place that does virtual interviews), cost of living for audition rotations, don’t forget to budget extra for some interview outfits. You will also want to set some money aside to afford to move to your residency program location as well! If you need some extra cash look into private loans for residency and relocation. These loans were made for medical students preparing to transition to residency.

Tip 2: The Application Process- Applying to residency programs is stressful and the amount of programs in each field of medicine can be overwhelming. Be sure to give your loved one some grace during this time. They have spent the past three years leading up to this moment so the stress can definitely feel overwhelming at times. If you are moving with them on the next phase (residency) then be sure to be included in the process of making a list together. We narrowed down our list to places that we could see ourself living, places we could afford to live and places where our family would be happy. For some you may want to be closer to family and loved ones, some may want to live close to a beach, lake, desert, or mountains. We also made sure all the places we applied were affordable for our budget. Residence pay is more than what you have lived on in medical school but still may be considered low income depending on what part of the country you chose to live in. 

Tip 3: Interviews- As the interviews start to roll in, the excitement starts to build… things are finally happening! During this time my best advice is to be supportive, listen, offer feedback when possible, be honest with your feelings on programs or places that you like or don’t like. But most of all remind them to be themselves! This is the one chance your loved one has to add that “wow” factor and impress programs. They will want to prepare ahead of time what may set them apart from other candidates. I will tell you that some programs look strictly at scores and achievements, while others are looking at who will be a good fit at their program. If the interview is in person, be sure to encourage them to attend the residency dinner the night before the interview (this may be in person or virtual depending on the residency program). This is a great time for them to get to know the program and the potential future co residents. Also, they can ask questions like what is the program hours like, does anyone have families and how much call will there be the first year. Some programs will also invite you to join along if you are in town as well. Make sure your loved one gets a good nights rest to prepare for interview day. So if it is in person or virtual be sure to be yourself and show the program why you will be a good fit!

Tip 4: Audition Rotations- Audition rotations are tough! If you are like us and have a family than audition rotations will be the most challenging part of this med school experience. I tried to prepare myself and our kids for audition rotations but it was still way harder than expected. For weeks I was a solo parent and it was lonely and depressing at times. For my husband it was overwhelming and stressful to feel like he had to be the perfect student at all times. Just like me he felt lonely and depressed to come home to an apartment far away from his family. The best advice I can give you is that it’s temporary and make sure you try and spend quality time before and after they return…. also, thank goodness for FaceTime (such a blessing)!

Tip 5: Back up Plan– Be patient but have a plan b! As interviews start to roll in, it can be exciting but nerve wracking. If your loved one is trying to match to a competitive program it really does come down to numbers. They will want to get as many interviews as possible because that means they will have more chances of ranking into a program of their interest. However, it is always best to have a backup plan and it is better now to get the ball rolling than to have to do it in a rush and scramble aka SOAP.

Tip 6: Create a Match List- While this may seem like the easiest part of your med school adventure it can get quite complicated. We have found that creating a spreadsheet with pros and cons for each program that you interview at worked best for us. Another idea is to bring an index card to each interview or keep notes in your phone, so you can write down all the programs pros and cons while they are still fresh in your brain. Remember that your list will be ranked in that order so be sure to rank each program from favorite to least favorite program. Ranking our list was so incredibly difficult because we were so split between the North and the South. We loved a program in the south (This is where we matched!) but all of our friends and family live in the North. Sometimes your rank list needs to be between you and your loved one and what really matters to the both of you since it is going to affect where you will be living for the next few years.

Tip 7: Love Letters- Don’t be afraid to send letters of interest! If your loved one really wants a program, tell them! Remember that you and your loved one have the upper hand in the match when it comes to ranking but programs do like to hear that your loved one wants to go to their program. I don’t recommend doing this to every program they apply to, because programs do talk to one another and word does get around. Also, If your loved one really wants a program, don’t be afraid to have them reach out to their schools staff, mentor or any physician that could write them an additional letter of recommendation.

Tip 8: Relax- Enjoy the last few months of medical school! Once your loved one submits that rank list there is no reason to stress… well, until Match Day. If you are like me and you are too excited about the new adventure you are about to embark on, put that time to good use and start packing! For packing tips, check out my article 7 Fabulous Moving Tips from a Dr. Wife Also, be sure to spend as much time as you can with loved ones because intern year is going to be a new kind of beast you will have to conquer!

Let me be the first to congratulate you for making it this far! I hope you & your loved one Match to your top program and good luck on your medical journey!

Happy Survivin’

10 Magical Things to do at Walt Disney World without a Theme Park Ticket!

In our house we love all things Disney! But most of all we love visiting Walt Disney World. My family and I like to visit multiple times a year. Since my husband is in residency and we are on a tight budget, Disney vacations for a family of five can get costly quick, so I have to get creative. Here are a few budget friendly ideas that are sure to bring that Disney magic to your vacation just without the additional theme park ticket cost!

 Spend the day relaxing by the pool– The number one complaint I always seem to have about our vacations is I always wish we had more down time. So make sure to plan a day to do just that. Pool days are my favorite days to sit back and relax! Be sure to pack a bag filled with drinks & snacks. Don’t forget the sunscreen and some pool toys for the kiddos! The one benefit for staying on Disney property is they have the best pools (in my opinion). They also have life guards and cast members who have all kinds of fun events and pool activities. My kiddos have made Mickey Tie-dye t-shirts, played bingo, and have played Disney trivia. The amazing pool bars are also a huge benefit, too!

Spend the day at Disney Springs– I love to shop and ever since Downtown Disney has become Disney Springs it has nearly doubled in size and doubled in fun! We have gone at least a dozen times and still have not seen or done everything they have to offer. Disney Springs has a little of everything for everyone in your family. They have several toy stores for your kiddos to choose from. They also have amazing boutiques for the fashionista in your family. For the little ones in your family they have a carousel and a small train they can ride for a small fee. For the adventure seekers in your family, be sure to check out Characters in Flight. If you love bowling and billiards be sure to check out Splitsville, which is a luxury bowling alley. Maybe you are in the mood to kick back, see a flick and grab a bite to eat? If so, then head on over to the AMC theater in Disney Springs. For the car lovers in your family you can ride in a vintage amphicar at the Boathouse. These guided tours are the thrill of a lifetime as they drive on land and into the water. As you can see, there is a little something for everyone!

Go miniature golfing– Disney has two miniature golf experiences just outside the parks. Fantasia Gardens Miniature Golf is located in the Epcot Resort area just outside the Walt Disney World Swan hotel. This course is great for families and beginner golfers. I love the Fantasia theme, it makes you feel like you stepped into the movie! The Winter Summerland miniature golf is the second course. My family loves this one because you can choose either the winter side or the summer side. Both take you on a crazy adventure that lead you to Santa’s workshop in the end. My kiddos love the magical surprises you come across as you make your way through the course.

Check out the Disney Resorts arcade– All Disney Resorts have arcades. Now I know what you are thinking, I must be crazy listing this as a suggestion. But on our most recent trip to Disney the weather was not the best and this was a great way to entertain the kiddos for a few hours. They even have a few massaging chairs for the adults to relax in while the kiddos are off playing games. We also found that not all the games cost money, which is always a plus when you’re on a budget! We found a few that were free of charge and those ended up being my kids favorite games. Disney uses an arcade card system which is usually located at the entrance of the arcade. You can load cash or card onto an arcade card which is then used to swipe at all the arcade machines. These arcade cards can be reused so be sure to hold onto them for future use. Some of our favorite games were pinball and the air hockey table!

Ride the Monorail– My kids love to spend a few hours every Disney vacation riding the monorail. We have to do it every trip we take. My kids love to stop at all of the monorail resorts and go into all of the shops. Plus, the views of the Magic Kingdom and the Disney Resorts are spectacular. It is such a magical and unique element that only Disney offers. Another fun up and coming ride is the new Disney Skyliner! We still have yet to ride it, but if you have then it let us know if you enjoyed it in the comments below!

Chip ‘N’ Dale’s Campfire Sing Along at Disney’s Fort Wilderness Resort and Campground

Explore other Disney Resorts– If you are looking for a fun way to add a touch of Disney to your vacation be sure to explore the Disney Resorts. You can grab a bite to eat, shop in the resort boutique, rent bikes, or even take a stroll to take in the unique Disney decor. Some of my favorite resorts to explore are Disney’s Polynesian Village Resort, Disney’s Fort Wilderness Resort and Campground, and Disney’s Animal Kingdom Lodge Resort. I love Disney’s Polynesian Village Resort because it’s one of the only places to get a Dole Whip outside the parks! Right now, if you head on over to the Barefoot Pool bar you can even check out the Lime Dole Whip Margarita which features Disney’s Special Heart of Te Fiti Lime Dole Whip with margarita mix. I can’t wait to try it myself on our next trip! I love Disney’s Fort Wilderness Resort and Campground because they offer an archery experience (which makes me feel like Merida, from the Disney movie Brave!). They also offer Horse-drawn carriage rides, pony rides and wagon rides. Be sure to check out the Chip ‘N’ Dale Campfire Sing-A-long, for some good ole’ fashion fun roasting marshmallows over the campfire. I also love Disney’s Animal Kingdom Lodge because it feels like you just stepped into the heart of Africa with the exotic animals to view on the savannah and the spectacular African decor. Don’t forget to grab a Zebra dome and some Jungle Juice in the quick service on property called the Mara. While you’re exploring the resorts be sure to check out the amazing restaurants on property.

Go For a Round of Golf– Tee off and hit the greens! Disney has four gorgeous golf courses on property:

  • Disney’s Magnolia Golf Course
  • Disney’s Lake Buena Vista Golf Course
  • Disney’s Palm Golf Course
  • Disney’s Oak Trail Golf Course

Disney offers discounts for Florida Residents, Annual Passholders, Cast members, DVC as well as Resort Guests. They also offer FootGolf, which is a 9 hole course that is like traditional golf but instead of a golfball you use a soccer ball.

Run in a Fun Run at select Disney Resorts– As you all know there is nothing I love more than running and Disney. Well I am here to tell you that select Walt Disney World Resorts host Fun Runs pretty much all time! (how cool is that, right?!?) Here is the list of resorts that participate:

  • Disney’s Saratoga Springs Resort
  • Disney’s Old Key West Resort
  • Disney’s Yacht and Beach Club Resort
  • Disney’s Boardwalk Resort
  • Disney’s Port Orleans Riverside & French Quarter Resort
  • Disney’s All Star Movies Resort

Be sure to check with your resort for times and weekly schedules as well as Fun Run fees!

Rent a Boat or Sea Raycer- Set sails on Seven Seas Lagoon! I will be honest this is a bucket item for us. Every trip we talk about renting Sea Raycers and we never have enough time but that is not going to stop me from telling you all about this nifty little activity! The Sea Raycers seat up to two people and cost $32 plus tax for 30 mins. Drivers must be at least 12 years old and at least 5 feet tall. There are two kinds of boat rentals you can rent in Disney. One is the Boston Whaler Montauk. This love boat seats up to six people and costs $45 plus tax for 30 mins. Drivers must be 18 years of age. Lastly, you can rent a Sun Tracker Pontoon boat which seats up to 10 people for $45 plus tax for 30 mins. Drivers must be 18 years of age. Disney also offers Specialty Cruises but those are very pricey and I could never afford them on a residents budget.

Jellyrolls dueling piano bar located at Disney’s Boardwalk

Check out Disney’s Boardwalk– Our favorite time to head to the Boardwalk is just after dinner once the sunsets, this is when the fun is just about to begin on the Boardwalk. You never know what kind of entertainment you will find from magicians to jugglers. You can even have a caricature artist draw a picture of you to capture the magic! My daughter loves to get her hair wrapped and beaded by the hair wrappers. They also have some carnival games, for a fee of course! One of my favorite things to do on the Boardwalk is grab a slice of pizza from the Boardwalk Pizza Window the head on over to the Boardwalk Joe’s Marvelous Margaritas stand and grab myself a frozen strawberry margarita! (They are sooo good!) Then my husband and I like to get a sitter and head on over to Jellyrolls which is a dueling piano bar (Don’t be fooled by the name, trust me this place is rowdy and a ton of fun!) They do have a cover charge of $15 and doors open at 7:00pm. If you love to dance head on next door to the Atlantic Dance Hall where you can dance the night away… well actually only on Tuesdays through Saturdays from 9:00pm-2:00am. The Boardwalk also has restaurants and shops so while you are there, be sure to check them out!

I hope you enjoyed my tips and I can’t wait to hear what your favorite non-Disney park day things your family enjoys to do! Be sure to check out my article, What’s in my Disney Park Bag for Disney packing tips! I hope you have a magical trip!

Happy Travelin’

Disclaimer: This article is based on my opinions and is not affiliated or being endorsed by Walt Disney World or any other Disney company. If you are looking to rent a boat please contact Walt Disney World, as I can not rent boats on your behalf.

Tips for Living off a Residents Income

One of the biggest misconceptions of residency is the pay! Most people assume that once you graduate from medical school and become a doctor that you’re rich! Well I am here to tell you that… it’s not true! Residents earn a decent income however, in our case, I am a stay at home mom, so that residents income has to stretch for a family of five! If you add up the long hours and the fact that on many weeks my husband only has one day off then his salary ends up being less than minimum wage! Yeah, you read that correctly! Less than minimum wage, folks! So as you can see residency life is not easy and it takes some creative planning to survive. Here are a few tips I’ve learned along the way!
 
You Need a Budget!– If you don’t have a budget yet it’s time to start! Now a days there is an app for everything including creating a budget that works for you. Some months our budget is a hot mess because life happens like unexpectedly needing to replace tires on our car! Try to create a nest egg for yourself, even if it means you can only put away $10 every paycheck. This nest egg will not only come in handy for the future but it also comes in handy for when the holidays come around.
 
Shop Smart– Since I stay at home, I do all the shopping. I coupon, I read flyers, I stay on top of the weekly ads. I love reward programs that give you points or cash back for purchases. I even use reusable bags to save a few cents. I shop at multiple stores each week for things like household items and food (I know it sounds crazy!) If you hate to shop, don’t worry! Many stores now offer to do the shopping for you and some will even deliver to your home. All of these things require me to plan ahead and can be time-consuming. The savings add up over time so trust me when I say it’s worth it!
 
Cut out extra spending To save money we rent movies instead of going to the movie theater. If we do splurge to see a flick we go on a weekday to take advantage of special deals like buy one get one free. We also only eat out one night a week and, you guessed it, we eat out with a coupon or on kids eat free nights! You have no idea how hard this is for us since we like to eat how feel, haha! I also keep an ongoing list of things we need for our house or for ourselves that over time we purchase when we have money left over in our budget.
 
Buy Secondhand– We have growing kids who always seem to need something. I consign most of my kiddos clothing and toys. I love to shop consignment store deals during off seasons and stock up for the following year. By doing this I’ve saved hundreds! Clothing isn’t the only thing we buy secondhand we also buy used furniture and toys from yard sales and online marketplaces.
 
Being in residency is like a real life version of survivor except nobody gets voted off the island. Instead you have to learn to survive with the cards that are dealt to you. You will find ways to help make life easier and over time it does get better. Residency is very much like medical school in which the days are long but the years are short. It will be over before you know it and you will be back to making a decent income once again. Just know that you can do this! It’s not easy, but you got this! For more money saving tricks, check out my article Shopping on a Med Student budget!  Be sure to comment below your tips and tricks you have used along the way to help get you and your family!
 
 
Happy Survivin’
 
 
Disclaimer: This article is based on my own experiences and opinions.

Dear Fourth Year Medical Student Spouse…

Dear Fourth Year Medical Student Spouse and Significant Others,

First, I just want to tell you that I see you and all the hard work you do. You are amazing and your loved ones would not be the able to be the best darn doctor they can be if it were not for your support too, so thank you for all that you do! You are the real MVP behind the white coat! Congratulations on making it through medical school and now onward and upward to the next new adventure and new beginning… residency!

Currently we are about to go into our second year of residency (Yayyyyy!!!).  Residency is hard, there is no question about that! Intern year is by far the worst year of this journey for us. Many of us have to move across the country with relatively short notice and leave behind all of our family and friends. We then have to start over again in a new town, often feeling alone and scared. The advantage of starting is over is exactly that, a clean slate, a fresh start. A chance to begin again. For us this is our next chapter in our medical journey and we hope it brings us peace. But I am not going to lie to you, it is hard at times. The hours are awful! Your spouse is now at the bottom of the totem pole. The pager will now be your worst nightmare and don’t even get me started on the dreaded words “on call” and “overnights”. All of these things you didn’t have to deal with in medical school are now going to be part of your new normal and it’s going to be a difficult change even for the most seasoned couple. Hang in there, friend!

Even though, this medical journey can be challenging at times. It will get better over time. Just be patient. As I’ve said in the past, find your tribe (I hope you heard me in the back or I will say it again!), don’t be afraid to call upon them when you need something or even just a shoulder to cry on. People will admire your strength and those that truly have your back will be the ones to catch you when you fall. So, if you fall, dust yourself off and stand back up! But don’t be afraid to ask for help!

When we first started our medical journey I would often hear other medical spouses talk about how they resented their spouse for putting their family through this grueling lifestyle. I am often taken back by these comments. When I married my husband almost ten years ago I knew he wanted to be a doctor. I knew some of the challenges we would face. I was the one who pushed my husband to apply to medical school. I felt like if he was passionate enough about this dream then he should pursue it. Even though at times this journey has been more than challenging, it has been important for my husband and I to remain on the same team. We both made the plan to pursue this life. We both agreed on his match list. We both know that residency is just temporary. So when those feelings of resentment start to creep up on me, I just remember that this was just as much my decision as it was his. Talk with your spouse about your struggles. Make a list of things they can do to help you, this can be as simple as listening to you vent or taking out the trash. Marriage is hard work and it requires constant up keep so be sure to work as a team! Always be each other’s biggest cheerleader!

I often have to remind myself that this medical journey is a long one and it is important not to put your life on hold. Being a wife and a mother is often a selfless job. We sometimes have to sacrifice our own happiness for others. Some days are harder than others but remember that someday all of this will be worth it. Live in the moment and just take it one day at a time but don’t forget to take care of yourself. Sometimes just working on being the best version of yourself is enough.

Remember that everyone’s medical journey is different but we all have the same end goal to help our medical spouses live their dream of helping others, and if your ever in Florida let’s go visit Mickey Mouse and grab a Dole Whip!

Warmly,

Your Fellow Dr. Wife in Training

Don’t Be Afraid When You Don’t Fit In

Last month, I had the opportunity to be a guest blogger for the Married to Doctors podcast website.  If you are not listening to Lara’s podcast, you need to start! She is amazing!! I am honored to be able to share our family’s story with other medical families who may also be struggling like we were in medical school and give them hope that it will get better. So be sure to check out my article below and give Lara’s podcast “Married to Doctors” a listen (You can tune in on everything from Spotify to Apple podcasts)!

Thank you again for all of your love and support! Don’t Be Afraid When You Don’t Fit In

Edit- I was just informed that the website is no longer working. So I am attaching the article below!

Happy Travelin’


Looking back now medical school for our family was all about chasing the highs and
weathering the storms of the lows. After moving thousands of miles across the country. Medical
school was the first time we had ever been completely on our own. It was just my husband and
I. If I had to describe myself back then, I’d say I was excited but nervous about the long medical
journey ahead. Four years of school and four years of residency training seemed like a lifetime
and for this reason, I couldn’t wait to meet all the other medical student significant others who
would be on the journey with me. I just knew we would all quickly be bonded for life like the girls
from the “Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants” movie. Unfortunately, I quickly realized that my
family stuck out like a sore thumb. The only way I can describe it, is that I felt like we were
unicorns in a sea of zebras! There were only a handful of medical students with families in my
husbands’ class but we seemed to be the only ones with kids who seemed different. We
couldn’t quite figure out why but early social events just didn’t feel right. Our kids weren’t
interacting like the other kids and we just weren’t enjoying ourselves at all. We had no idea why
and after a while we just stopped trying. It was devastating for me. I felt so alone.

About a month into medical school, we received news that our nine month old baby had
a rare disease called food protein-induced enterocolitis syndrome or ‘FPIES’. This explained his
persistent episodes of projectile vomiting and lethargy. He had 38 food allergies that could
cause an FPIES reaction. Each reaction seemed worse than the last and would leave my baby
gray and lethargic, too weak to support his own head and vomiting so forcefully that he had
trouble catching his breath in between retches. I was relieved to have a diagnosis but it also
meant a self imposed house arrest for us for the foreseeable future. He was at the age where
he would put anything in his mouth and a literal crumb could trigger a reaction. I made sure my
home was always so clean that you could safely eat off my floor. I treated my house like a Fort
Knox of cleanliness and allergen-free eating. The last thing on my mind now was meeting new
friends and having play dates in our new city. Instead, I was a mama bear who needed to keep
her baby safe from the allergen-filled outside world.

With all these allergies to common foods like corn, soy and dairy, he required special
formula just to avoid reactions. We could not afford this special formula on a medical student
budget so we had to use WIC (Women, Infants & Children) vouchers to pay for it. To this day, I
am so grateful for WIC and without that program we would not have been able to feed our very
sick baby boy. Luckily, by age four, he had actually outgrown all 38 food allergies and is now
bigger than his older brother! Those years of being trapped in the house and playing with him all
day long are now some of my favorite memories. To this day, I still find myself checking
ingredients for allergens, so I guess once an allergy mom always an allergy mom!
Two years into medical school, and days before my other son was about to start
Kindergarten, my world was again changed forever when we awoke in the early morning hours
to find him having a full tonic-clonic seizure at the foot of our bed. That night will forever be
engraved into my brain because, for a few moments, we thought we were going to lose our sweet boy forever. I will never forget my husband telling me he thought he was going to have to
start CPR, because he had stopped breathing. I remember screaming at my husband that I
couldn’t remember how to dial 911. Once he was transferred to the hospital, the ER doctor told
us this was likely an isolated seizure and would probably never happen again. The next night,
just to be safe, we decided to sleep in shifts and have him sleep between us. Sure enough, he
had another seizure. This time he was able to come out of it and managed to say to us, “I hate it
when that happens.” My husband and I were in complete and utter shock! We took him back to
the hospital for an EEG. After the test, the neurologist came into the room, sat us down and
said, “The EEG was abnormal. Your son has epilepsy.” After he said those words my body went
numb and everything was a blur from then on. We were admitted that night for further testing.
That was one of the longest nights of my life. I kept thinking of all of these awful things that are
associated with epilepsy. Luckily the remainder of his tests came back normal and he was
discharged on daily medication.

To this day, epilepsy has been one of the hardest things we faced in medical school
because it is still so unexpected and can strike in a moments notice. Every seizure still scares
the daylights out of me and, at this point, I swear they have taken years off my life. I hate that
my sweet boy has to go through this and I hate that his little brother and older sister have to see
it and step up to help me when their dad is at work. I am also grateful though, because it is
making them both more accepting and accommodating of those with disabilities and special
needs. Our daughter is currently writing a speech for her school project to educate her peers
about epilepsy and what to do if you ever come across someone having a seizure.
I know what you’re thinking, it can’t get any worse for this poor family right?!? Well, yes
and no… so before epilepsy was even a factor, we knew my oldest son was special. I mentioned
before that social events just didn’t work well for us. He always did things different from my other
children. He had special dietary needs, sensory needs, etc. So, after years of occupational
therapy and conversations with his pediatrician, I set up an appointment with a developmental
pediatrician. When I set up the appointment, my husband and I both suspected he might have
Aspergers syndrome, which is now considered part of the Autism Spectrum Disorder. After
years of being worked up with other GI doctors back home in Boston before medical school,
though, I kind of figured they would just say they couldn’t find anything wrong and send us on
our way.

So, after 15 months of waiting the day finally came! My husband and I made a list of all
the behaviors and signs that we had noticed over the past years. That day, the pediatrician
came in asked me some questions before taking my son in and performing the examination. A
few hours later I was called in and she sat me down and said, “You were right, your son has
Aspergers syndrome which is now a part of the Autism Spectrum Disorder”. Once again my
body went numb. For some reason, this diagnosis was harder for me to swallow at first. From
there, it took me months of grieving, acceptance and lots and lots of tears. Then finally, one day
I looked at him and realized it’s simply a diagnosis and nothing more. He is still my sweet boy
who loves cars, America and his family so much. Even though those first few months were tough, I definitely think it was important for me to go through that to be able to be the best autism mom I can be for him today.

Even though I didn’t manage to leave medical school with a pair of magical pants or a
sisterhood of best friends, I did have a kick ass team of family and friends that supported us
(many from across the country!) through the good and bad. If I could describe myself now, I
would say that I’m stronger for it and still hopeful for the future. I know my story may be nothing
like yours but it is just that, my story. Life is what you make of it. Even in our lowest of our lows,
there were people I would have never expected to be there who showed up for us. Those are
the people who matter to me now. They may not have a special needs kiddo or have a doctor
spouse but they are my tribe and I’m forever grateful.

So, if you ever find yourself in a sea of zebras, don’t be afraid to be a unicorn!